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The next time I dropped in to see Vlad, he was hard at work at an enormous dog turd. Must have been ten feet high. "What's the deal?" I asked him."You know that expression that architects have? The turd in the plaza?" he replied.I knew. When an architect designs a modern office building, it is almost obligatory to include an abstract, usually ugly, piece of statuary in front of it, or in the courtyard."So now it will be a real turd?" I asked."You bet. I'm working with this architect from Skiddles and Owning. We are going to stick it to the architecture critics in town." And stick it they did. The critics raved about the contrast between the clean lines of the building and the enormous turd. Orders started pouring in, for ever more massive piles of shit. But Vlad ignored them."I'm working on something really new," he told me one evening at our local, the Beer Place. "Can't tell you yet. But it will be massive." "Can you tell me where?" I asked."Not yet," he said. "But it will be. J. agrees, masking his inward bafflement. “But then, I met you, and I just like knew!” she now exclaims enthusiastically, throwing her arms energetically out in front of her. “It was just like, wow! We totally, totally align!” She pauses, dropping her arms to her side. “It’s just that…there’s something, like, missing…” she continues in a dejected tone. “But, if we align, what’s missing?” J.J. asks in total bewilderment. “I don’t know…like, I just don’t know…” Kerri replies, her frustration evident. “I’ve been consulting the crystals, but it’s just not clear…Anyway, it’s getting late,” she now announces, pulling him up from the sofa. “You’d better get home. I’m going to try reading the crystals again tonight before I go to bed. Maybe I’ll find the answer.”Friday, June 3. “Yes, Aaron, you can do my lawn for me, but it’s going to have to be our little secret,” Melissa informs Aaron as they stand together in her living room. “I just don’t want my husband to know. He gets so jealous!”.
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